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2 months ago

Overcoming Perfectionism and Self-Doubt: A Lesson from Psychology

Growing up, I always felt the need to be perfect. I pushed myself to excel in school and extracurriculars, constantly worrying about what others thought of me. Deep down, this pressure stemmed from insecurity especially about my appearance, which my parents and surroundings often criticized.

Over time, this perfectionism led to anxiety and self-doubt. I realized I wasn’t just chasing success; I was trying to prove my worth. My fear of failure and judgment kept me trapped in a cycle of stress.

In psychology, there’s a concept called the id, ego, and superego, three parts of our personality that shape our thoughts and behavior:

Id – Our raw desires and impulses.

Ego – The rational part that balances our needs with reality.

Superego – The inner critic shaped by societal and parental expectations.

My superego had become overly strict, setting impossible standards for myself. It made me believe that if I wasn’t perfect, I wasn’t good enough.

Once I recognized this, I started working on:

Letting go of unrealistic expectations – I reminded myself that perfection is an illusion.

Practicing self-compassion – Instead of criticizing myself, I learned to be kind and forgiving.

Balancing my inner voice – I allowed my ego to step in and mediate between my desires (id) and self-criticism (superego).

By understanding these psychological concepts, I shifted my mindset from perfectionism to self-acceptance. I realized that my worth isn’t defined by success or external validation, it comes from within.

If you struggle with self-doubt and anxiety, ask yourself:

  • Are my expectations realistic?
  • Am I being too harsh on myself?
  • How can I practice more self-compassion?

Psychology doesn’t just exist in textbooks, it helps us understand ourselves better and live with more confidence.

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      1. The first step in overcoming self-doubt and anxiety is to understand the underlying thought patterns that fuel them. By recognizing how perfectionism and unrealistic expectations impact your mindset, you can start questioning whether these beliefs truly serve you. These reflective questions can help you shift your perspective. However, if self-doubt and anxiety are significantly affecting your daily life, relationships, or overall well-being, it’s important to seek support from a professional. Therapy or counseling can provide guidance tailored to your personal experiences and help you develop healthier coping strategies.

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